Awareness of, and respect for, boundaries is essential for building the safe, secure, trusted and supportive relationships that visiting is all about. Some boundaries will be decided by you and/or the person you meet in detention, others will be set by your visitor group.
Drawing and maintaining boundaries will help the person you are visiting to understand your role and remit as visitor, and can protect you and the person in detention you visit from harm. Some boundaries might feel useful to you, and others may feel frustrating and restrictive.
Your visitor group might set out boundaries in a Volunteer Agreement document or Code of Conduct, along with other policies such as safeguarding and confidentiality policies. It is important to be aware of these, and know what is expected of you when you are acting on behalf of the group. There will also be areas in which you will need to decide on your own boundaries, based on your own preferences and wellbeing.
Navigating boundaries when you are involved in a relationship of care and solidarity with someone can be incredibly difficult. Boundaries might also shift depending on the circumstances of the person you are supporting, the nature of your relationship with them, the wider political situation, and your visitor group's resources and capacity at a particular time. Bringing challenging decisions to your group and reflecting on the different factors affecting decisions around boundaries can be really helpful for your wellbeing.
It can help to think before you start visiting about possible situations that might arise and how you might respond, as well as make sure you understand relevant group policies. This will help you to respond more thoughtfully in the moment, and prevent you from making a promise you cannot keep. These situations could include:
Whether or not you will share any of your personal details, such as your phone number or email address
Whether or not you can offer money or phone credit
Whether or not you can collect people’s belongings (e.g from their home, a friend or a police station)
How you will respond to someone who holds beliefs you strongly disagree with or if they say something disrespectful or offensive
Whether or not you will act as a financial supporter for someone as part of their bail application
Whether or not you will remain in touch with someone after they leave detention
It is likely your group will have guidelines on how to respond to in these situations. For example, many groups will recommend you don’t give out your personal phone number and leave responsibility to make follow-up phone calls to a group co-ordinator or specific volunteer. If you do agree to call someone, you might decide to get a simple phone specifically for your volunteering and agree the times when you will be available to call or message.
While boundaries can vary by group and individual relationship, here are some important do’s and don’ts, drawing on the experience of the AVID network:
Do:
Keep everything shared with you confidential unless you are concerned someone is at immediate risk of harm, according to your groups policies. Make sure the person you are visiting is aware of this policy
Support the person you are visiting to make their own decisions that are right for them, and only act on their behalf with explicit consent
Follow your groups procedures and the rules of the centre you are visiting
Clearly explain the limits your role as a visitor at the start of your relationship and again if you need to, including the fact you cannot give legal advice
Make sure you can keep your word before you agree to doing something - if you are unsure about your group's policy, explain that you don’t know if you can help and you need to find out!
Don’t:
Stray into giving someone legal advice, unless you are qualified to do so
Share your personal address or give more personal information than is necessary
Initiate physical contact - although if you feel comfortable you might respond to appropriate physical contact initiated by the person you are visiting (e.g a handshake or a hug)
Get involved in an intimate relationship with the person you are visiting
Accept harassment, aggression or other inappropriate behaviour. People will often need to express anger and frustration, but aggression or abuse directed at volunteers should not be tolerated.
Give items or money to the other person other than what is agreed in your group’s guidelines
People in detention may assume visitors are part of the Home Office. It is very important to emphasise at the start of a visit that you are independent from the Home Office and from the centre management. It can help to carry with you a written statement about who you are in the first language of the person you are visiting, to help communicate this clearly.
Wearing informal clothing and colours that are clearly different from the colours of centre or Home Office staff can help to distinguish you from staff or immigration officials.
The way you interact with centre management can influence whether you are perceived as someone who can be trusted. Make sure you are courteous to staff, but avoid non-essential conversation.
Active, empathetic listening is critical if we are to build relationships of trust and solidarity with people we visit. Through listening and showing empathy, we demonstrate we value the people we are meeting and can witness the injustices they face.
Active and empathetic listening is also a powerful tool in providing emotional support. People in detention experience a wide range of emotions: depression, anger, confusion, frustration, fear, powerlessness - not to mention boredom, tiredness, loneliness, and lack of privacy. When we listen well we make space for people to articulate these feelings, which can provide short term relief and support people to find ways of coping with these feelings.
A good place to begin is with open questions, allowing the person you are visiting to steer the conversation and decide what they want to share with you.
Here are some further tips from visitors and those who have been visited:
What can help people feel listened to?
> Demonstrating warmth and openness towards them through our voice and body language
> Repeat back to people what they have said to us, and check that we have understood them
> Watching for and responding to nonverbal cues about someone's emotional state
> putting aside our own judgements and showing curiosity where you might disagree
> Leaving silences and space for people to share how they are feeling
> Remembering what people have shared with us
What might stop people feeling listened to?
> Asking for lots of detail about people's private lives when it isn't necessary
> Interrupting someone or turning the conversation around to our own problems
> Minimising someones problems or
> Saying that they shouldn't have the feelings they have
> Responding with judgements about people's lives and decisions
> Being too directive or quick to offer advice - this can exacerbate people’s sense of feeling out of control
Standing in solidarity with someone in detention requires a relationship of trust. People who have been in detention often describe how hard it can be to trust people when they have lost faith in the system to treat them with dignity and to do justice.
As a visitor you can work to become worthy of people’s trust by:
Only taking actions on behalf of someone with explicit consent.
Setting realistic expectations about your role, including the fact that you cannot give legal advice.
Only make promises you can keep, and if you are unsure what support your group can offer, check with your group before making a promise.
Following up promptly on any actions you agree to do, and keep the person you are visiting updated with regular communication.
Keeping what is shared with you confidential, according to your groups confidentiality policies. Don't share any information with staff or other agencies unless you are explicitly asked to share it.
Ensuring that the information you share with people is accurate, and avoid providing hope where it is not justified.
Don’t push for information on the person’s background or case- let them bring that information to you. Don’t interrogate inconsistencies.
Be patient and don’t be put off or upset if conversation doesn’t flow or a visit is difficult.
State and demonstrate independence from the centre management.